The standard approach to love stories involves displaying extravagant expressions through flowers, anniversary celebrations and flawless photographic displays. The experience of mental illness transforms love into a distinct form. The experience moves at a reduced speed while maintaining an extended timeframe and demonstrating a greater need for waiting. My husband and I have spent eight years together, during which I discovered that love extends beyond romantic feelings. It encompasses the continuous partnership of two people who share their most vulnerable moments.

My mind experiences days of detachment from my own self because depression, anxiety and schizoaffective disorder present their challenges. The world presents situations when everything becomes overwhelming because of excessive noise, unbearable weight or extreme disorientation. During those times, love becomes something very practical. The experience involves having someone who stays with you during your silent moments of feeling overwhelming emotions. The person functions as a companion who needs to remind you about your medication schedule and will quietly sit with you during your times of noncommunication.

Mental illness requires people to show their most vulnerable state. People cannot conceal their breakdowns, anxious episodes and delicate times. The experience of mental illness requires that you reveal your deep inner self to another person who struggles to understand their own identity. The process requires you to reveal your unwell state while you trust they will remain present with you.

The process of being vulnerable demands that both people demonstrate their ability to wait throughout the whole experience. My husband learned that healing progresses through multiple stages. Life presents moments of light and hope, and then brings back the need to begin again. The process of dealing with all situations demonstrates how one can show love. The person possesses a commitment to maintain their presence during challenging times while they avoid the impulse to resolve all issues immediately.

Partnership stands as the fundamental element that binds our relationship together. My mental illness exists as part of my existence, but it does not define our love. We work through our challenges as a couple who face imperfect moments and times of frustration while we maintain our belief that we belong to the same team.

After eight years, I have understood that love consists of two elements which people mistakenly think they can rescue. The process requires you to remain with them as they acquire the ability to rescue themselves. The most powerful type of love exists as a calm form of affection.